


Why Me?-YOONMIN

by yoonmin_weknow



Category: bts, btsfanfic - Fandom, btsship - Fandom, yoonmin - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:14:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 11,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24640696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yoonmin_weknow/pseuds/yoonmin_weknow
Summary: He is depressed and has a pretty horrible life.  He was about to end it all when someone saved him and now will not leave his side. All he can ask is "why me?".[warning: lot of struggles with mental health and talks of suicide}





	1. Chapter 1

**Ch. 1-The Decision**

yoongi pov:

I am a little edgy. It is true. As I am walking across this bridge, I reflect on the decisions and the events that led me here. The start of horrible rumors, the constant bullying and shaming that I deal with on a daily, and my GOD awful parents.

I have never been comfortable with the way I look. I actually hate myself and my parents don't help a bit. I am currently a student at a high school in Seoul but I hate every single living aspect of high school. I am constantly bullied for my "emo-ness" and my almost sickly body. I am too thin. I made myself this way. I still hate it though. There were rumors spread about me at my school and they were anything but kind. It was rumored that I had sex with a teacher because I was too stupid to get good grades. It was also rumored that I was put up for adoption cause I was such a disappointment to my parents. Which I am a disappointment to them but not enough to get kicked out, yet.

Now my parents are the absolute worst. Also, they are alcoholics and insane. That is just one reason why I HATE alcohol. I hate everything about it. There are so many other things that make them the worst parents ever other than just their alcoholism. They are bullies, to put it lightly. They are bigger bullies then the ones at school but I guess that I am used to it. No! I am lying. I will never get used to it. I already hate myself and they make it worse. I am a complete disappointment to them. Whatever I do it is not good enough. I have all A's except in English. I struggle a little in English. I can write! I really can, but I don't like sharing my work so I don't turn the assignments in. It is not that I am so proud of my work that I don't want anyone to steal it but more along the lines of I barely accept my own work and do not want to be judged by others more than I already am. My parents see my B in English as the bane of life itself. Whatever I do it is not good enough for them. I don't understand why my hardest, my best isn't good enough. I don't understand. Why am I not good enough? Will I ever be?

All of this would probably be different if I had friends. But I don't. I had one friend but they passed away last year and I have kept on going downhill since then. I am very introverted and I like to spend time by myself, but everyone needs friends. Right? It is not that I don't want friends. Believe me I do. But making them isn't as easy as it seems when you have rumors spread about you constantly. Everyone needs someone that they can talk to about anything and my one and only friend was taken from me by some idiot. He was murdered in a car accident by a driver that was under the influence. That is the main reason why I despise alcohol. 

I hate alcohol. I hate high school. I hate the constant rumors. I hate bullies. I hate my situation. I hate everything right now. I just need to end it all. 

As I finish reflecting, I find no reason to carry on. No last hope. No saving grace. Nothing to keep me here. I start the climb to make my jump.


	2. The Discovery

jimin pov:

I left my house to go on my daily run near the lake. I use this time to clear my head and to focus on important decisions in my life. I have a good life and good friends. I am happy. I am the peacemaker in my squad and that is both good and bad. I love to help them out but I can't pick sides. I have to hear everything including what they are struggling with or who they are fighting with at the moment. During my run, I start to think of my friends and what they were struggling with. I have always taken on my friends struggles and burdens. I focus on their troubles in order to not be consumed by mine. I don't have many but the ones that are present are hidden beneath fake smiles. 

I continued to run for a while before I stopped to catch my breath. I found a water fountain in a park near by. After my break, I decided to run farther since I had more to think about and no homework. I go to a high school in Seoul and it is pretty bad. I have my friends though that make it all worth while. 

I have to think about college and what I want to do. Junior year is the year of decisions and pressure. I continued to contemplate these things as I came across a bridge. This was a beautiful bridge that out-looked the lake in the most wonderful way. The lake was shimmering and splendid. I wanted to take in the glory of the scene so I slowed to a walk. I walk onto the bridge to get a better view and sit at the bench facing the exquisite waters.

I sat there and blocked out everything around me including the boy that had sat down on the bench next to mine. I didn't even notice he was there until he started mumbling things about himself. I then took a chance to look at him and he seemed extremely upset. I don't think that the boy even knew that I was sitting there. I wanted to ask the boy what he was upset about but I was afraid that it would be weird. I didn't know the boy personally so I thought it would be best not to approach him. Although, I had a horrible feeling that something bad was going to happen I looked back to the lake.

I started to get up knowing that it was late and my parents would want me to be home soon. I began to run and as I ran I noticed tears streaming down his face. I keep glancing back towards the boy every once and a while as I ran. I was not running fast but the boy soon disappeared from my view. I felt my heart beating hard and it was not from the running. I was anxious. No one should be alone, especially crying like that. I decided to run back. I was determined to help in anyway that I could. As he came back into view, I saw him approach the other side of the bridge with tears running down his face even fiercer than before. He started to climb to the railing until he was on the edge. I realized what was happening and sprinted to the bridge not caring about my loss of breath and pain in my chest. I could see him shaking and I knew that I had to run faster. 

I saw him begin to lean off the edge and prepare to jump. I didn't try to talk him out of it. I knew that it was too late for that. He closed his eyes and let go. Thankfully, I was right behind him and grabbed him. We both fell, our backs hitting the wood planks of the bridge. I was in large amounts of pain but that wasn't my focus, the boy was. I saw that he still had his eyes closed and was trembling, not knowing what happened. That didn't matter. He was okay now.

I saved him.


	3. The Realization

yoongi pov:

I thought that I had finally done it. I thought that I was dead. There isn't supposed to be pain after you are dead. Why does my body hurt? My legs. My back. My head. They all hurt. My hurt was supposed to be over. Death was supposed to end my pain. My suffering. This can't be it. I only see black. There is supposed to be something. Anything. I can't actually be dead because this can't be death. It just can't. I won't accept it. What is going on?

I opened my eyes and see the bridge that I was about to jump off of below me. I am on the planks of the bridge. I must have fallen the wrong way. I roll over to see a boy who looks like he is in pain. The boy stands up and begins to dust off his body. I guess he hasn't noticed that I am here but that is what I expected anyways. People either don't notice me or they notice me too much. There is no happy medium. 

I didn't know what to do. Who is this? Why is he here? Why was he on the planks of the bridge with me? Did he try to jump to? I want me questions answered but I don't want to talk to this guy to get them. I sit up and my head starts pounding even more. Ugh! Another migraine! Great! As I rub my throbbing head I hear a quiet voice coming from behind me. I don't move. I can barely hear what he said but I already know that I am not going to answer him. I am sitting on the floor trying to be less dizzy. My head is spinning. The boy moves to sit in front of me. He is obviously upset and he has a very pained look on his face. He keeps trying to talk to me. I can barely hear him. "What are you even saying? If you are trying to talk to me please speak up because I can't hear you." I say. He just looks at me. He is blocking my way and I want to sit up so I start to raise my arm to move him but I immediately double over in pain. "What the heck is wrong with my arm?" He then responds, "Crap! I am so sorry! That is all my fault! What can I do for you? How can I help? We should go get it checked out right now and make sure it is not broken!"

I could hear what he said but it wasn't registering. Why does he care? Why is it his fault? Who is he? I can't wrap my brain around the fact that he seems so concerned. I am just staring at him dumbfounded. What the heck is going on? Gosh! My head hurts. I thought that if I continued to glare at him and not respond then he would go away. But he didn't. Instead, as I glared at him he started to smile. Not the fake ones that I am used to but a sincere smile. This boy makes my head hurt. I am so confused. Why would he smile at me? I don't deserve sincere smiles. What is wrong with this boy?

I finally decide to answer since he obviously isn't going anywhere anytime soon. "I don't want to come across as rude but who are you? Also, why do you care if I am hurt?" I question. He lowers his head and just laughs. Not like a teasing or evil laugh but almost a giggle. He looks up and says, "I don't think that you are being rude. Also, I care because I can see that you are hurt and I want to help. I think that helping others by showing kindness and support is the best thing that anyone can do in life." After he finishes he just sits there smiling sincerely again!

I really like his way of thinking. I have never met someone who thinks so selflessly before. I guess it explains the sincere smile then. I am glad that he doesn't think that I was being rude. I have had to clarify that I am not being rude on multiple occasions. If I don't then it goes the wrong way and more people hate me. But this boy is different. He doesn't seem to hate me for some reason. Wait a second. I still don't even know who this boy is. I learned his way of thinking but not who he is. Ugh! I need to know so I ask again, "I like the way you think but again, who are you?"

He immediately responds with one of his laughs and says, "Oh, my bad! My name is Jimin. I am the one who saved you from jumping."


	4. The Sympathy

jimin pov:

I can't believe that I forgot to tell him who I was. He was probably terrified of me. I was so worried that he was hurt so it slipped my mind. So I laughed and replied, "Oh, my bad! My name is Jimin. I am the one who saved you from jumping." I then flashed my biggest and most sincere smile.

I wasn't looking for thanks or recognition of some kind. I just wanted to show that I was happy to help. My smile was not reciprocated. The glare that I got didn't give the impression that he was happy though. He looked mad but then his expression changed to neutrality.

I started to become concerned. He did look pissed about what happened. He doesn't respond to what I said but instead glares off into the distance. I asked, "Are you okay?" He looks over and glares at me and then looks back out into the distance. Wow. Stupid Jimin. Of course he's not okay, he just tried to kill himself. Why am I such an idiot? Why do I always make things worse? I have to fix this.

"Hey, um I don't know your name but I really do think that you hurt your arm so I really think that um we should or you should go get it checked out. I really don't want you walking around with a broken arm because of me and um I will pay for it if you are concerned about the cost."

He doesn't spare me a glance, this time, but instead he just says, "I am not trying to be rude but please leave." I was so taken aback, "What?" I said. He just repeated "please leave." I was so confused. Does he not understand that I am trying to help? I simply question, "Why won't you let me help you? I get that we literally just met but you are hurt and you need to get your body checked in order to heal yourself properly." I am waiting for it to click in his head that he is severely hurt and needs help and that I simply want to help to ease the process.

He finally looks at me and simply says, "I don't deserve it." He then looks away again and I see a tear fall. "What do you mean? What do not deserve?" I question. He doesn't look at me this time but stares off into the distance and says, "I don't deserve help. I don't deserve your help. I don't deserve your concern. I don't deserve your kindness or your willingness. I don't even deserve to be alive so if you could please leave so I can kill myself in peace, that would be wonderful." He continues to cry quietly even after what he said.

I can't believe that the boy that I just flipping saved wants me to leave so he can try to kill himself again. I literally can't handle this any longer. Why is he not getting the clear message that I'm sending? I reply with, "First of all, everyone deserves to be alive. Everyone. Secondly, I will not let you kill yourself in "peace" so deal with me being here because I am not leaving." He doesn't look over but just says, "I am fine and I just want to be alone so please, I am begging you, leave." His tears just stream down faster but he was still quiet. It was as if his crying would bother someone. I am the only one here and it sure as heck doesn't bother me. I decide that he needs to understand something very important. So I get up from where I was sitting and move and sit right in front of the crying boy, therefore blocking his view and interrupting his stare out into the distance. I wait for him to look up at me and say,

"I ran back because I saw you crying and I believe that no one should be alone when they are crying. So there is definitely no way in heck that I am leaving you all alone now." 


	5. The Request

yoongi pov:

He won't stop talking about how much he cares. Why is he so kind? Ugh. I can't handle this anymore. I am pissed. Can he not just leave so I can kill myself for real? I am so tired of my life and the pain that I am in. Why can't I just die? It is what I deserve. When you get told stuff often enough you start to believe it. Wow. What "great friends" I had. This is all too much I need to stop thinking. I hit my breaking point, again and now I am crying, again. I try to turn away from Jimin because I don't want his pity or comfort or judgement. I decide to reply to his kindness with the only answer that I can think of. I turn to him and say," I don't deserve it."

I turn back around but I think that he caught my teary eyes. I know that he is probably confused. My thought is proven correct when he asks, "What do you mean?" Even though I don't want to go into detail about what I mean, for some reason, I feel like I owe him an explanation. So I explain and then I tell him that I want him to leave so I can kill myself in peace. I don't think that he took it well.

He says something about everyone deserving to live and not leaving me. I couldn't really focus on what he was saying because of everything going on in my head. So I replied that I am fine and begged him to leave but I guess with tears streaming down my face it wasn't very convincing that I was "fine". I tried to quietly cry. It is what I trained myself to do because of my parents. I also don't want to bother anyone with my annoying crying. I was so busy thinking about my crying that I didn't notice Jimin move and sit right in front of me. I had been staring into the distance and all of the sudden he was in front of me. I looked up and straight in to his eyes. As soon as I did, he started talking as if he was waiting for the eye contact that we had just made. He said that he ran back because I was crying and no one should be alone when they cry and that there was no way that he would leave me crying all alone now.

I didn't know how to respond but my body did. I started to cry harder and I hung my head and even with the pain that I was in my knees retreated to my chest. I couldn't speak. Why is he like this? I don't deserve it. I don't know how to respond to kindness because I don't experience any. I don't understand why he stays. I push everyone away. Or they just leave me. Why is it that the one person that I beg to leave, the only person who might actually listen to a request of mine because he i?s kind and cares for me, is the only person who won't leave me. He refuses to let me suffer alone.

My mind is racing and my thoughts are scattered. Jimin touches my hands that are hugging my knee so tight. I don't even dare to look up. He taps my hands and says, "Excuse me? I hate to bother you and I am sure that you are sick of me being all up in your business but do you need anything? You have been like this for 15 minutes. I promise that I am here to help not harm. Also I am sorry if I scared you when I touched you the first time. I am definitely not gonna to hurt you. Please let me help you. Also what's your name? I need to know so I can go get help."

It was a lot to process. I must have flinched when he touched me and that is why he thinks he scared me. Also I had no idea how long I had been like that. It felt like seconds. Oh no. Jimin asked for my name. If I tell him will he recognize me? Maybe one of his friends is one of my secret bullies. Maybe he has heard rumors about me. He is gonna hate me. I can't breathe. I start to hyperventilate. I look up with a panicked expression and red puffy face. I probably look insane. Ugh. I am panicking. **I. Can't. Breathe.**


	6. The Concern

jimin pov:

I always try to help but I make things worse. **Every. Single. Time.**

What is wrong with me? I just made him cry harder. I wanted to make things better. I want to comfort. But I made it worse. He is sobbing now with his knees in his chest and his head even lower. I just watch him. What's wrong with me? I can't do anything right. I am so selfish. I am here thinking about me when there is a guy struggling right in front of me. 

**Get it together, Jimin.**

I need to comfort him. I decide to do what I do with my other friends. Wait is this boy my friend? I hope that he will be when all of this is over. I stuck out my hands and placed them over his trembling hands that were hugging his knees. He doesn't respond physically or verbally so I remove my hands and just tab his hands gently. He doesn't look up still but flinched and then his hands stop shaking. I decided that this is the best time to comfort since I know that he is paying attention. I apologized for bothering him and explain that he had been in his current position for 15 minutes and asks if he needs anything and tries to make sure that he knew that I was there to help not harm and apologized for scaring him. The last thing I said was pretty hecking stupid of me. I asked for his name.

I didn't think that it would be a big deal but it was. He started to hyperventilate and finally looked up but with a panicked expression and puffy eyes and face from crying. This look saddened me. He looks like he can't breather. I think he is having a panic attack. I don't know what to do. Everything that I try to do to help always backfires with him. I ask, "what can I do?" and admit that "I don't know what to do." He looks at me straight into my eyes and says, "Help!" and passes out.

I start to cry. I ran over him and hover my hand above his mouth. I can feel his breath so I know that he is not dead. I have to think quick. I decide to do the only thing that I know how to do... **run.** I pick him up and move him to the bench so I can get him onto my back. I am very careful of his arm because I am sure that it is broken. I'm finally able to move him to my back.

I start running back the way I came and decide that I can't take him to my house. My parents would flip. I can only take him to the hospital. He does need to be checked, especially after this. I am holding on to him so tight and I know that if he was awake I would be hurting him. I promised that I would never hurt him. Ugh. I need to get there faster I can't hurt him any longer. I hate myself I don't want to hurt him. I start to cry again. I can't do anything right. Jimin. Now is the time to think about the boy not yourself. Gosh. I am so selfish. What is wrong with me?

I have been running for 10 minutes with a dreadfully light boy on my back and I am crying. I just want to get him help. I am trying not to focus on my own pain. I continue to run and I see the hospital in view. Thank goodness. I can barely breathe. I run faster and run straight through the ER doors.

I am fretted by a nurse that looks very calm and caring. She stopped me from running more and asked, "what is wrong? and how can I help?" I try to speak but I can't. I am still out of breath. She says, "Deep breathes. It is all okay now," and motions someone over to take the boy off of my back. I realize that they are trying to take him and I move away and say no. I am am not letting him out of my sight. They caring but I can't trust them. She looks at me shocked and asks again, "what's wrong?" I say that my friend has passed out and won't wake up and needs medical attention. She smiles and responds saying, "Okay sweetie, we can help you and your friend. Let's walk this way and let the other nurses take your friend and they will help him." I tighten my grip on him and state that I am not leaving him. She seems surprised but goes with it and points at the other nurses and states to follow them. I follow them down the hall into a room where they take him off my back and place him on the bed. I start to cry. I can see the bruises on his wrist and I don't know if they are from me or the fact that his arm is probably broken. I feel like I let him down and broke my promise. I feel like a monster. 

One of the male nurses walks over to the side of the bed that I was standing on and offers me tissues. He says, "Your friend is going be okay. Don't worry." I simply nod. He then continues," Have you called his parents or your parents? You should let someone know." I agree but I don't have his parents numbers. I then see his phone in his pocket. I say that my phone is dead so I'll just use his and they just roll with it. I take his phone out and pray that it is not password protected. It isn't. **Thank the Lord.** I open his phone and pull up his contacts. There are only 4. Mom, Dad, Brother, and Kihyun. I then realize that his mom has called 32 times so I decide to call her first. 

It dials and rings once before I hear what I think is the voice of his mom. she doesn't even give me a chance to say hello before she starts screaming. She starts yelling, "Wow! How nice of you to finally call back. You know the purpose of a phone, right? What the heck is wrong with you? You are so worthless. I got a call from the school today saying that you went to the nurses again. You piece of trash. Why do you always crave attention? Not everything is about you. Actually nothing should be about you. You serve no purpose on this earth. Don't even bother even coming home. I am pissed and so is your father and you know what happens when he is pissed. Jump off a bridge for all I care but I don't want to see your face. You can't do anything right. You are so worthless. I don't want to hear from or see you again. Good luck suffering by yourself and don't come crawling back to us because we won't let you. You are on your own. Figure it out. Don't contact us ever again, Yoongi!" Then she hung up.

I was speechless. This is how he is treated. I couldn't even comprehend everything that wad just screamed at me. Well as bad as this is I still need to tell someone about...wait. I know his name now? Yoongi. I like that name. I need to tell someone about Yoongi and his parents aren't an option and I feel like his brother could be like his parents so that will be my last resort. Time to call Kihyun.

I dial the number and it goes straight to a machine that says that the number and phone no longer exist. That is weird but that only leaves his brother. I am scared to call but I need to do this for Yoongi. I dial the number and it rings for a long time. I almost gave up hope when someone answers.

He says, "Yoongi, did they hurt you again?"


	7. The Waiting

**"Yoongi, did they hurt you again?"**

Jimin decides to respond even though he wants to know why Yoongi's brother says "again" and wants to know who "they" are.

"Hello, is this Yoongi's brother?

"Yes, this is Yongchan, Yoongi's brother. Is Yoongi alive?

"Yes, he is alive but is passed out and hurt badly."

"Ok, who is this and where is he?"

"This is Park Jimin and we are at the Northside ER."

"You guys are at an ER? How? Yoongi hates hospitals. wait... how do you know my brother and why do you have his phone? Do our parents know where you guys are?"

"It is a long story and I don't know if..."

"Jimin, do our parents know?!"

"I don't think so. Why? What's wrong?"

"Jimin stay with Yoongi and try to calm him down if he wakes up and don't make anymore calls on this phone ok? I am on my way to you guys now."

"I will not leave his side."

" Ok, keep my brother safe Jimin." -call ended

** JIMIN POV: **

Jimin was shocked. He was freaking out on the inside. What the heck is wrong with Yoongi's family? I thought mine was bad but his is really crappy. I can't even process what is going on but I do know that I need to wait for Yongchan to get here and I need to be here for Yoongi when he wakes up. Yoongi is going to wake up, right? Wait, what if he doesn't wake up? Crap. I am panicking. Oh no. It is all my fault that he is here. I need to know when he is gonna wake up so I ask, "Excuse me, nurse! My friend is gonna wake up right? He is okay right? He'll be fine right?

One of the nurses looks over and sees my panicky expression and responds very calmly, " It is gonna be ok. We need to know more about your friend in order to properly heal him. We know that he passed out after having a panic attack and we can tell that his arm is hurt. Is there anything else that you can tell us?"

I calm myself down with deep breaths. I don't want to tell them about Yoongi's suicide attempt but I will tell them about the fall that followed. "He fell onto the floor of the bridge in the park and hit his head and I think he broke a couple of bones. He then started to hyperventilate and start to panic and passed out. That is all that I know." The nurse thanked me for the info and went to go run some test on Yoongi. They asked me to step outside while they ran them and I tried to refuse but they said that they can't properly help him until I leave the room. So I said that I will step right outside and watch through the window in the door. I decided to pull out my phone in order to update my parents on my location. They know that my runs are sometimes long but never this long. I know that they probably have a tracker on my phone but if I don't update them I will get in trouble. I call my mom first because she had called me just a few minutes ago. The phone rings a couple of times before I hear the similar voice of my mom. 

"Hello?...Jimin?... Why didn't you answer my calls? You aren't on your run anymore, are you?"

"Hey, Mom. Sorry that I couldn't answer your call. I am not on my run anymore. I came across someone who needed help so I helped them to the hospital."

"Jimin, you know that you are not allowed to talk to people after school. You better not be meeting up with one of your school friends. You need to come home and do school and focus on books not people or friends. You know the rules. I want you to leave where you are right now and come home immediately!"

"Mom, can I please stay here for a bit longer? This person..."

"Jimin! Did you not hear what I said? Who cares about that person? Come Straight home."

"Mom..." Yoongi's phone is ringing in my pocket. I take it out and it is Yongchan.

"Ok, mom, I will. I have to go."

"Straight. Home. Jimin"

"Okay, bye." I hang up and answer Yongchan's call. 

"Hello, this is Jimin."

"Jimin! Is my brother still ok?"

"Yes, I am watching him right now."

"Okay, I am here. what is the room number?"

"Rm 1027 on the first floor"

"okay I am coming for you now."

Yongchan hung up the phone before I could respond. I decide to walk back in because it looks like they are done with the test. I walk in and the nurse from before approaches me and says, "You were right. Your friend's arm is broken. He has a concussion, his femur is fractured, and a couple of his ribs are broken. That fall that he took must have been really bad. Also, it looks like he hasn't eaten anything yet today." I was in shock yet again. But all I could ask was "why hasn't he woken up yet?" The nurse said, "Due to his concussion and his lack of food, when he started to have a panic attack his body started to shut down because it couldn't run properly."

I was devastated so I just nodded that I understood, I just want Yoongi to wake up. I just want him to be okay. I was pulled from my thoughts when someone busted through the door without a care. It was Yongchan. I could just tell. I thought that everything would be okay now that he was here but what he said next made my doubts run wild.

"Don't touch my brother anymore! We are leaving now!" 


	8. The Assistance

The hospital room was dead silent. The nurses were shocked. Jimin was shocked. Yongchan started to remove the things that Yoongi was hooked up to and started to try to wake him up. Jimin ran to Yongchan. "Please stop. He needs help. He is very hurt." Yongchan replied, "If Yoongi wakes up we will have more problems than him just being hurt." 

Jimin was wondering exactly to what extent Yoongi hated hospitals and why, but he decided to focus on the task at hand. "Yongchan, what do we suggest we do? He has injuries that he can't just walk off. He needs casts and braces and medicine and maybe even surgery for his broken arm. Unless you have another place that can provide him with everything he needs, I am not letting you take him."

Yongchan stopped unplugging things and looked to the nurses, "Does he need surgery for his arm?" The nurses said that he should be fine without surgery if he wears a stabilizing cast for 3 months. Yongchan then looked to Jimin and stated, "I have somewhere we can go to get him help without him flipping out and causing problems and where there are people that he can trust."

Jimin nods. "Ok, you can take him but I want to come with you guys. What happened to Yoongi and my fault and I want to make sure they he gets the healing that he needs." Yongchan thought about it and asked, " Why are you so concerned? Do you even know him? Why are you so set on helping? You have done enough for him already you can go home. I can take care of my brother alone. I appreciate your help, but I got him now."

"I know that you are perfectly capable of taking care of him but I want to help. So please don't tell me to forget about caring about him and to go home. Please let me come."

Yongchan was tired of arguing and realized that there was no talking Jimin out of coming with so he nodded hesitantly and said that if he is gonna come then they better leave soon because Yoongi could wake up at anytime. They got Yoongi unplugged from all of the machines and signed all of the paperwork that was needed. 

Yongchan carried Yoongi out of the hospital with Jimin by his side. They reached the car and got inside. Yongchan was happy that Yoongi had someone that cared about him like Jimin but he didn't know Jimin at all and couldn't trust him completely. Jimin sat in the back of the car silently until his curiosity got the best of him. He asked where they were taking Yoongi to get the proper medical care if they weren't going to the hospital. Yongchan sighed loudly, "Jimin please trust me, okay? I am a licensed doctor and I have my own medical company so I am taking him there. I always take him there whenever he gets hurt."

Jimin was very surprised to find out that Yongchan was a doctor but it made sense. He really just wanted Yoongi to be okay. "Thanks for telling me." Yongchan nods. "We are almost there. Can you carry Yoongi in? I have to make sure his room is ready." Jimin nods. "I can carry him." They arrive. Jimin is confused. This is a house. Not an office building or something. He thinks that the medical company that Yongchan owns is maybe just in his house? Yongchan sees Jimin's confused look and explains that he runs that practice out of his basement. Jimin now understands. "Grab Yoongi and follow me. Be gentle with him. He is hurt. Well you already know that. Sorry. Habit." Jimin laughed. "It is okay. Let's go." Jimin grabbed Yoongi very gently and followed Yongchan into the house and down the stairs and to a room with the name Min on it. 

Jimin is confused. Yongchan said that we were putting Yoongi in his room but this room has the name Min on it. Jimin wants clarification so he asks, "Is this Yoongi's room? Who is Min?" Yongchan is confused. "Yes this is his room. You should know who Min is though. Jimin, how long have you known Yoongi?" Jimin doesn't know how to respond. "Um...I have known who he is for a long time but we just..." Jimin's phone starts ring and interrupts what he was gonna say. Jimin checks and it is his mom. Jimin totally forgot that his mom gave him an order to be home. He doesn't care. Yoongi is more important. He declines the call.

Yongchan stares at him suspiciously and asks him is finish what he was gonna say. Jimin stutters but says that they just met this morning. Yongchan seems pissed and then says, " Oh. You just met him this morning? " Jimin nods. "Wow. Just wow." Yongchan starts laughing. "I am just kidding I'm not mad or anything. It actually makes sense that you just met because what other reason would you have to not know his last name. Haha" Jimin gets hit with the realization that Min is their last name. That makes sense. Jimin just decides to laugh it off. "OK. I am done questioning you for now. Bring Yoongi in here and set him on the table. Let's get my little bro better."


	9. The Healing

Jimin sets Yoongi on the table. Yongchan immediately takes the oxygen machine off of the wall and starts to plug it in. "Jimin, you said that he had a panic attack before he passed out right?" "Yeah he did! Why?" Yongchan hooks up the oxygen to Yoongi. "If he had a panic attack then he is short of breath. He is lacking oxygen. This is gonna help him regain consciousness." Once the oxygen mask is on Yoongi immediately starts to breathe better. He starts to move again and can finally take the deep breaths that he needs. A huge smile appears on Jimin's face. "He is already doing better. What else should we do?" Yongchan answers, "We have to wait for him to wake up to see what his other symptoms are. But since we are waiting we can use this time and you can tell me all the details of what happened to my brother."

Jimin was nervous. His phone rings again. It was his mom again. " Jimin, your phone always seems to conveniently ring every time that I try to question you. Why is that?" " I am sorry I have to answer this. I promise I will answer your questions." Jimin answers the phone.

"Where the heck are you park jimin? It has been WELL over TEN minutes and you are not home. Care to flipping explain why you declined my last call and where the frick you are?"

"Mom, I can't really explain but I am helping someone and that is the right thing to do and..."

"Jimin I don't care if this person was on their flipping Deathbed! You are supposed to obey me and no one else. Gosh. You are ALWAYS so selfish. Why can't you do anything right?! Come flipping home now or I will come and find you and you will never leave the house again."

"I am sorry mom. I can't do that."

"Jimin if you.." Jimin hangs up the phone and turns it off so his mom can't track it. A tear escapes his eye. He quickly wipes it off so Yongchan doesn't see, but he did see and he heard too. Jimin's mom wasn't exactly quiet. "Jimin if you need to go.." " No I am not going home. I don't care about being home on time right now. Yoongi is more important." Yongchan nods and smiles. "I am glad that you have taking a liking to my brother. Especially so soon. Since you just met him this morning. He doesn't have many friends that I know of. So can you explain how you guys met and how he got hurt now?" "Oh yeah of course"

"I can do that." said Yoongi.

He was awake. He was finally awake.


	10. The Biggest Heart

Yoongi is finally awake. He sits up with his whole body aching. "Yongchan, what am I doing here?" 

"Yoongi, I need you to be completely calm. ok? Your friend took you to the hospital but then called me and I picked you up and now we are here so that I can treat your injuries." Yoongi had tensed when Yongchan said that he was at a hospital. Yoongi is very upset. They can tell just by his face and the way that he is sitting. Jimin now has backed into the corner of the room because he feels like the reason that Yoongi is upset is his fault. Jimin looks guilty and is hanging his head low as he says, "Yoongi?" Yoongi looks up at him. "I am so sorry. I know that you are probably mad at me and I know that I got in your business and did the exact opposite of what you wanted. I didn't know that you hated hospitals so much. I just freaked out after you passed out. I was so worried so I carried you to the hospital because I thought that the hospital could help you. I was so scared. I didn't want you to be alone. I called your brother and told him about how you were hurt. I am so sorry. You are very hurt and in loads of pain because of me. I know that you just wanted me to leave you but I couldn't. I'm sorry."

Yoongi takes a second to look at the boy and he can tell how genuine his words are. Yoongi is not mad but confused about how the boy standing in the corner with his head hung low can care so much for someone that he doesn't even know. This boy stopped him from jumping off a bridge and comforted him and told him how much he cares and how he is not alone. This boy worried about him after he passed out and carried him to the hospital. This boy called his brother in concern for him and made sure that what he was doing was okay. This boy even came along to his brother house because he didn't want to leave him when anyone else would have just left. This boy is different and has a bigger heart than Yoongi could ever put into words. 

Yongchan has finally had enough of everyone being vague. "What happened to you, Yoongi? One of you tell me the truth of exactly what happened right now." Jimin finally looks up and locks eyes with Yoongi. He didn't realize that Yoongi had been staring at him. Jimin looks away. Yoongi doesn't take his eyes off of the boy standing in the corner but takes this chance to talk first. "Yongchan, it is not something that I want to talk about right now. I hope that you can understand that. I am in a lot of pain and would like that to be dealt with first and I have lots of homework to do. And..." Jimin looks over to Yoongi. "We need to take you home. Thank you for the help but my brother and I can handle it from here." Yongchan takes this chance to look between the two boys that have been locking eyes for a bit. He can't tell what they are trying to convey as they stare intently at each other. He does notice that they understand each other though. He decides to break up their conversation. "Jimin." Both boys look over. " I need to treat Yoongi. I don't mind if you stay but you already have helped a tremendous amount so I can drive you home now." Jimin doesn't hesitate in answering. "Yongchan, I would be happy to stay but if I am making Yoongi uncomfortable and wants me to leave..." Jimin looks over to Yoongi. " then I will." Jimin then hangs his head again. Yongchan answers, "Well I actually could use your help with some things so if you don't mind..." Jimin looks up at Yoongi as if he is asked for permission. Yoongi face is stoic. He doesn't seem to disagree with Jimin staying. Jimin answers Yongchan while looking at Yoongi with his softest eye smile, "I am happy to help until you send me away!" 

Jimin laughs a little and Yoongi realizes that this boy has the biggest heart.


	11. Don't Leave

Yoongi has not taken his eyes off of Jimin since he decided to stay. Yoongi is trying to figure out the boy in front of him. Jimin has been smiling while doing whatever Yongchan is asking him to do. He is just so happy to be able to help. Yoongi doesn't get that. He understands caring for people. Yoongi does care about people but not people that he doesn't know. Jimin doesn't know him yet seems to care more than someone should. Yoongi drops his head and starts to think about all of the people that were supposed to care about him but don't. He finds it hard to go through life when the only people that are "required" to care and love him don't. His family. More specifically everyone but his brother. He doesn't think that his brother should care about him though. All he does is cause problems for Yongchan. He is a burden to him. Yongchan would never say it to Yoongi but he knows that his brother must be tired of having to help him. Yoongi would be ok if his brother didn't want anything to do with him anymore. He understands. He causes problems for Yongchan. 

Jimin looks over to Yoongi and sees that is head is hanging low and he seems to be deep in thought. Yongchan ran upstairs to grab a few things. Jimin was now in this room alone with Yoongi. He contemplates if he should go over to Yoongi to check on him but that could possibly bother him. Jimin doesn't want to be a bother to Yoongi but he knows that the last time Yoongi was like that he soon started to have a panic attack and then proceeded to pass out. He decides to risk Yoongi being angry at him and walks over to him on the side of the bed and quietly calls his name, 

"Yoongi?" No answer. No sign that Yoongi even heard him. Jimin decides to take another risk. 

Jimin gently touched Yoongi arm and calls him again, "Yoongi?"

Yoongi immediately flinched and retracted his arm at the feeling of being touched. He looked up. There is Jimin just looking at him with big eyes that are full of worry. "I am sorry, what did you say, Jimin?"

Jimin giggled and smile a little. "I hadn't said anything yet but your name." Jimin smile then dropped. "Yoongi, please answer me honestly, do I make you uncomfortable?" Jimin paused, not long enough for Yoongi to answer though. "I don't want to be bothering you by being here. I see how you flinch when I touch you. I am sorry. I keep on involving myself. You know what. Don't answer that question. I am gonna leave. I am making things worse. I always do. Sorry for bothering you."

Yoongi had just been looking at Jimin and trying to understand. Had Yoongi made Jimin feel like he was making things worse? That is not what he wanted Jimin to feel at all. Although Jimin's caring nature was unexpected, Yoongi was still very thankful. Apparently, he did not show his gratitude well enough. Jimin started to walk away from the side of the bed to leave with his head down. Yoongi wanted to stop him. He doesn't want him to leave. Everyone leaves. He somehow always pushes people away. Yoongi did not want Jimin to leave him.

Yoongi went to reach for Jimin's arm but it was to far away already. He decided to get up and go after him. "Jimin?" He had forgotten that he had injured his legs and was not expected the pain that came with getting up from the bed. He fell to the ground with a big thud. Jimin immediately turned around after hearing his name and then a thud. He ran to Yoongi's side and was about to try to help him up but hesitated because of what happened the last time that he touched him. Jimin just hover his hands above Yoongi as if he would break if Jimin placed a finger on him. "Yoongi, why did you get up? You have to be careful. I don't want you to hurt yourself more." Jimin looked straight into Yoongi's eyes. They were pretty close. "Can I help you get back onto the bed?"

Yoongi had noticed that Jimin didn't touch him this time. Yoongi stared right back into Jimin's eyes and grabbed his arm as gently as possible. Yoongi looked down embarrassed. 

**"Please don't leave."**


	12. It's not Selfish

** JIMIN POV: **

"Please don't leave."

I was confused. Yoongi was touching me. He was also telling me not to leave. I thought that I was bothering him. I thought that he didn't want me here. His head is hung low and isn't looking at me. Is he hurt more? I am so stupid. He just fell and I am here thinking about myself. ugh. I hate myself. Focus on Yoongi. "Yoongi, let's get you back on the bed. Okay?" I go to grab him as gently as possible to lift him onto the bed but he tightened his grab on my arm. I look at him questioningly. It was almost like he was telling me to wait. His heading is still hung low and he won't look at me. I put my hand onto his hand that is grabbing my other arm. His grip immediately loosens.

"Come on, Yoongi, let me get you off of the floor." 

I take his hand off of my arm and put it on my shoulder. I scoop him up bridal style because that is what I thought would cause the least enough of pain. I don't think that he was expecting it because he immediately wrapped both of his arms around my neck. I lifted him and placed him on the bed gently. I unwrapped my arms from him and went to step away from him. He grabbed my hand with his and looked straight into my eyes. 

"Jimin, please don't leave me."

Here I am standing, completely speechless because this boy in front of me wants me to stay. Not just stay but stay with him. Of course I will stay if he wants me to. I was only gonna leave because I thought I was making everything worse but Yoongi sounded worried and sad when he told me not to leave. I don't want him to be sad. I need the make it clear that I am not going anywhere. 

"Yoongi," I move my hands so now my hands are around his. "I am not going to leave you. I was only going to leave because I thought that I was bothering you and making things worse. If you want me to stay with you, I will stay." Yoongi face is like stone but his eyes are teary. He is looking at his hand that in wrapped in mine. I forgot that. I am sure that he is uncomfortable. I should probably stop touching him now. I started to removed my hand when he said,

"Jimin, you weren't bothering me at all... and I am sorry that I made you feel that way. I am very thankful for all that you have been doing... I am sorry. I am being selfish, right? I am sure that you have other things to do or you need to be somewhere. You probably feel like you have to listen to everything I say because I am so unstable, right? Like if you don't do what I say I'll have a breakdown or something? I am sorry. I didn't mean to pressure you into anything. You can go." 

He slipped his hand out of mine and turned his body away from me. It had finally hit me how similar Yoongi and I are. "Yoongi, I am not going to touch you. Can you please turn towards me though?" Yoongi doesn't move. I need him to see how sincere I am when I say that I feel no pressure and I want to do this because I care about him. I climb up on the bed and sit right in front of him. He looks up shocked. We are so close that our knees are touching.

"Yoongi, I want you to listen to every word I say, okay?" He nods while keeping eye contact. "I care about you. That is why I stay. It is not because I feel pressure or cause you are 'unstable' or that I am afraid that you will have a breakdown. I stay cause I want to. Also, you are not being selfish by asking someone to stay with you. Never think that. It is okay to ask for help or anything else. I would gladly help you. I don't have other things to do and I don't need to be somewhere so... if you still want me too.... I will stay with you. Do you still want me to stay?" Yoongi nods. "Okay. I am going to go get some ice and find Yongchan." "No, please don't." I look at Yoongi. "What do you mean 'no'? I have to get you ice. You fell on the floor and you were already injured so you definitely need it." "Jimin, you said that I am not being selfish by asking someone to stay with me, right?" I nod. 

**"So please stay with me?"**


	13. Go Home

**"So please stay with me?"**

Yoongi seemed to be begging at this point. He was so desperate. He really needed someone to be with him and comfort him. He hadn't had someone like that in a long time. His only friend is gone and he can't "burden" Yongchan with his problems or struggles. Yoongi just wants to fix himself and not have to put anyone through the trouble of caring for him. He feels like he doesn't deserve it. He feels selfish when he asks for anything but Jimin told him that he was not. He wants to believe what Jimin said but he can't without feeling guilty.

** YOONGI POV: **

Ugh! I am so stupid. I need to stop asking for help. I feel guilty for asking Jimin to stay again after he wanted to leave. I should tell him to go. I am probably pissing him off with how much I change my mind. He probably hates me. I know I would if I were him. I am gonna tell Yongchan to take him home. No more changing my mind. I need to stop burdening people. I am sending him home and that is my final decision.

I look up and see Jimin smiling. Why is he smiling? What is there to be happy about? Why does he care? I don't deserve it. Why does Jimin being here make me feel better and worse at the same time? Why can't my head shut up and let me be happy? Ugh! I need to put on a mask to stay focused. I need to send Jimin away. I am making his life more difficult just by being in it. I need to help him by staying away from him. I look into Jimin's eyes. I need to sound confident when I say this or he will be able to see right through my mask.

"Ignore what I just said Jimin. I want you to go home. You don't need to be here. I will tell Yongchan to take you home." I looked away after. Looking at him will just make me want him to stay more. I need to push him away. I need to. I need to. I need to.

"Yoongi, I am so confused. You just asked me to stay with you and now you are pushing me away. Why? I thought you wanted me to stay. I may not need to be here but I want to be here for you...why won't you let me help you...why won't you let me care?"

I could hear the genuine hurt in Jimin's voice and it made me feel so guilty. Why do I keep hurting people? Why can't I do anything right? Why am I the way that I am? I can't answer Jimin's questions because I don't truly know the answers myself. I need to push him away. Yongchan just needs to take him home before I hurt him more.

"Yongchan," I yell. "Jimin needs to go home. Please come and take him." 

"Yoongi, I don't want to leave. I am gonna stay."

**"No, Jimin. Go home."**


	14. Is this Home?

Yongchan came down the stairs with boxes of supplies and walked straight into a very awkward situation. He noticed Yoongi avoiding Jimin's eye contact at all cost and Jimin staring Yoongi down. He doesn't know what the heck happened but he wasn't going ask. He didn't wanna be nosy...

"What the heck happened between you guys? There is a lot of awkward energy in here." 

Ok. So maybe Yongchan couldn't help himself. He was still wondering about the backstory between these two boys. His brother isn't one to make friends easily and he swore to not have another friend after Kihyun. What is so different about Jimin that made Yoongi accept a friendship again?

Yoongi spoke up, "Nothing happened. Jimin just realized that he needs to be getting home. He has more important things to do." Jimin looked at Yoongi now not staring him down but looked questioningly.

"Yoongi, you are the most important thing right now. What would I have to do at home that is more important?"

"Jimin, I am sorry that I made you feel guilty and you felt like you had to stay in order to make it up to me. I am just fine under my brother's care. You can go."

"Yoongi, that is not.."

"Boys, that is enough." said Yongchan. "There is no point in continuing discussing this. Jimin, I'll take you home."

Jimin wants to fight back in the hopes of staying but he doesn't want to overstep. He just nods and starts to follow Yongchan to his car. Jimin turns to Yoongi for the last time, "Bye Yoongi! I hope you heal fast! I hope to see you soon." Jimin flashed a quick eye smile and headed out to the car. 

Once in the car Jimin sighs loudly. He is upset to say the least. He doesn't want to go home. Yongchan heard the sigh and decided to speak up. 

"Jimin, I feel the need to apologize for my brother. He usually wants to be alone and doesn't know how to express that and he is not used to others seeing him in a vulnerable state. He usually tries to hide everything and then likes to keep it all bottled up. So I am sorry that he suddenly sent you away. I am sure that he didn't mean anything by it and that you did nothing wrong. So please don't worry. Ok?"

Jimin nodded. It made sense. "Thanks for explaining. I was a little confused but it is ok. Yoongi and I are very similar. I get it." 

"Oh, good! Alrighty! Let's get you home!" Yongchan exclaimed and started reversing out of the driveway.

The drive was silent other than the 80s rock playing in the background. Thankfully Jimin didn't live too far away from Yongchan's house. Jimin gave directions and soon enough they pulled into his driveway. Jimin house was very pretty and big and there were two cars in the driveway. That meant that both of his parents were home. Jimin thanked Yongchan for the ride and gave him his number in case Yongchan ever needed to contact him. Jimin got out of the car and walked to the front door. He pulled out his key, waved bye to Yongchan, and unlocked the door as quietly as possible. Yongchan had left the driveway. Jimin slowly opened the door and peaked inside to see if his parents were anywhere to be seen. He doesn't see them so he walks in and turns to close and lock the door. When he turns back around he is met with a slap full of force.

Jimin clutched his now burning cheek and looked at his mom. His mom screamed,

"WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU?"

Jimin just looked down knowing how the rest of the day is going to go. 

**This isn't home.**


	15. Screwed Up

** JIMIN POV: **

How am I not used to this by now? It is not like she has never slapped me before. Why does she hate me? I can't please her no matter what I do. I probably deserve it. Why am I such a screw up? They both hate me. What can I do to be loved? I wish that I could be good enough for them. 

"PARK JIMIN! I ASKED YOU A FLIPPING QUESTION! DO NOT MAKE ME REPEAT MYSELF!"

I hate it when I make her mad but I don't know how to respond. She already knows that I was helping someone in need but she doesn't care. I know that she is pissed that I disobeyed her and there is probably nothing that I can say to calm her down.

"JIMIN!" She grabs my chin and forces me to look at her. "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? ARE YOU FLIPPING DEAF?" 

"I am sorry mom. I just didn't know what to say. I was helping someone. They needed to be brought to the hospital. I just wanted to help." She let go of my chin and just glared .

"Did I SAY that you were ALLOWED to help? Why can't you just LISTEN? YOU NEVER LISTEN! Where the HELL did you learn to be such a PAIN? STOP SCREWING UP! 

"I am sorry. I was just trying to help..."

"THAT'S THE PROBLEM! You don't HELP people! You make EVERYTHING WORSE! You can't do ANYTHING right!" 

"mom..."

"DON'T TALK TO ME! GIVE ME YOUR PHONE NOW!" 

I pulled out my phone to give it to her and I saw that I had a text from Yongchan. Before I could read it she took it right out of my hands. 

"JIMIN, GO TO YOUR ROOM AND YOUR DAD WILL DEAL WITH YOU AFTER HE IS DONE WITH WORK! IF I HEAR ANY NOISE COMING FROM YOUR ROOM YOU WILL BE SORRY!"

I walked upstairs with my mom following behind me. As soon as I walk into my room she slams the door and I hear her latch it. She locked me in.

I grab a pillow and go into the farthest corner of my room. I try really hard not to cry but the tears flow anyway. I bury my head in the pillow to muffle my sobs. If I am heard crying it will be so much worse. I have made that mistake before and it was not pretty. After 30 minutes of sobbing, I stop crying and dry my face. I snuggle into my pillow and I get to thinking. I can't handle this anymore. This is too much! I really need to get outta here!

**I need to escape!**


	16. Migraines

Ever since Yongchan left to take Jimin home, Yoongi has been lying on the table and beating himself up for pushing someone away again. He was so worried that Jimin really hated him now. He was nice before he left though. The two sides of Yoongi's brain are fighting. One side is telling him that he shouldn't have pushed Jimin away and the other is telling him that he would have hurt Jimin and he needed to do this in order to protect him. This back and forth fighting has now given Yoongi a migraine. He hates migraines. He has them too often. Yoongi is now writhing in pain. 

Yoongi is just about to get up to find some pain killer and ice when Yongchan walks in the room.

"That was surprisingly quick! He must live nearby then." said Yoongi.

"No duh, Sherlock!" Yongchan responded hostily. 

"Hey, what is with your attitude?"

"Yoongi, you are really gonna ask me about my attitude right now? Are you kidding me? I got a call from you earlier and immediately thought that they had hurt you again or that you were dead. Do you know how much that scared me? Then finding out that you were in the hospital because you apparently fell. Which I don't believe by the way and suddenly you have a friend/not friend, Jimin, that is one of the sweetest people ever and you pushed him away. I have been in the dark about what is actually going on for hours and I need the full truth **now**."

Yoongi listened to every word and felt guilty for scaring his brother and getting him involved in the first place. Then again, it was technically Jimin who got Yongchan involved but he was just trying to do the right thing so he doesn't blame Jimin at all.

"Yongchan, I am sorry that I scared you and got you involved in all of this. I never wanted to bother you..."

"What have I said, Yoongi? You. Will. Never. Bother. Me. Please understand that."

"I know you say that but I can't stop the feeling that I bother people. Anyway, I never intended to leave you in the dark completely I just didn't know how to tell you what happened. I know that you are gonna be mad at me either way so I am just gonna start."

"Yoongi, I will never be mad at you for being honest. Go ahead and start though."

"Ok then. Everything pretty much started this morning before school when dad decided that I didn't need my ribs intact."


End file.
